Birdsong's Law Blog

Florida: A Florida ex-con arrested for trying to break back into prison because he couldn’t take life out on the streets was sentenced to 15 years for violating his parole.  Sylvester Jiles, 25, had been released after serving time for manslaughter, but said he wanted back in because he feared retaliation from his victim’s family.

The just punishment would have been not to jail him and leave him on the mean streets.

Dallas, TX: Krystal Gardner, 28, tried to stop a Dallas repo man from taking her car by tossing her year-old child into the back seat as he pulled away.  Her 15 year old son then shot the man in the leg with a 12 gauge shotgun.  Gardner and her son were arrested and the infant was taken into the custody of social services.

Deadbeats with no class!

Washington: A Washington state husband flew into a rage during couples counseling

Florida: The headline read: “Even rock stars aren’t this dumb about partying.”  A Florida man died of a drug overdose after celebrating passing his court ordered drug test by going out on a massive morphine binge.  After Michael Berg, 23, had been out drinking vodka and beer with friends he decided to drink a shot glass full of morphine and was found dead several hours later.

How foolish.  How sad…

Pittsburgh, PA: A fugitive wanted for bank robbery in Michigan is in a Pennsylvania jail after he walked out of a Pittsburgh hospital and into a bar wearing only his hospital gown, with an IV needle still in his arm.  Elbert Lewis Thompson II, 20, walked four blocks from Allegheny General Hospital to Jr’s Bar.  Police found he was wanted in Michigan after a traffic stop.  He had been hospitalized after saying he felt sick.

…sick of having no booze!

Washington: They say, all the technological innovation in the world can’t help a stupid criminal.  A 17 year old thief broke into a Washington state furniture store and before

Boulder, CO: A 52 year old Colorado woman has caused a sensation in her neighborhood by insisting on gardening wearing nothing but a yellow thong and pink gloves.  Police in boulder say Catharine Pierce is not breaking any laws, but neighbors are upset because there is a school nearby.  Pierce says forcing her to cover up would be a violation of her free speech rights.

What about our rights in not having to see a nude grandma!

Sacramento, CA: There may be racial profiling in this next one.  A California man named Calvin Ward is suing Sacramento police for repeatedly arresting him on warrants for a man named Calvin Phillips — even though he is black and the wanted man is white.  In addition, Ward — who has no criminal record  – is over six feet tall and Phillips is only 5-foot-8.

Sounds like the police need new glasses.

Russia: They call it Russian Roulette for a reason.  A guest ruined a Russian wedding by handing around a supposedly unloaded pistol, only to discover

Florida: This one makes driving while texting seem absolutely safe.  Florida police arrested a woman who wrecked her car trying to shave her bikini area as she drove.  “She said she was meeting her boyfriend in Key West and wanted to be ready,” said Trooper Gary Dunick.

Only in Flori DUH!

Switzerland: A Swiss man was visiting a transsexual brothel when a fire broke out, forcing him to run out naked onto a widow ledge — where a photographer snapped a photo that ran in the local paper.  The man was released from a hospital after being treated for minor burns, but his reputation has been permanently wounded.

Really embarrassing…

Wichita, KS: Police found a man bleeding from the head in Wichita and told them he got the wound after handing a drug dealer Monopoly money in exchange for crack

Mozambique: How disquieting!  A farmer in Mozambique is insisting that two men he caught drunkenly having sex with one of his goats “marry” the beast in a traditional ceremony as part of the owner’s compensation.  The farmer says he is particularly interested in the traditional dowry.