CANADA: We learn that a 19 year old British Columbia woman drove to the local police station to pick up her boyfriend who had been caught and cited for drunken driving. However, there was problem – she, too, had been drinking and had to be arrested at the station. “The moral of the story is don’t drive to the police station if you have been drinking,” stated police sergeant Dean Jantzen.
HIC!
KENTUCKY: Nine ultra conservative Amish men have been sent to jail after they repeatedly refused to put orange safety reflectors on the back of their horse drawn carriages. The men have reportedly contended that the day glow orange triangles are immodest and they refuse to “pimp their rides,” in the name of safety.
Darn right! Stand by your principles men. The Amish Nine!
OHIO: Ride by beardings? A mysterious gang of Amish men in Ohio have been ridding horse drawn carriages up to the homes of other Amish, breaking into their homes and grabbing men so they can cut off their beards. Officials speculate that it may be part of a feud between sects.
Amish gone wild…
FRANCE: A French prison inmate managed to kill himself despite the fact he was wearing a prison anti-suicide uniform. He somehow fashioned a noose that could support his weight out of the paper jump suit that is issued to suicidal convicts, leaving Paris correction officers wondering how he could have done it.
I smell a wrongful death lawsuit against the manufacturer of the paper jump suit…
