FLORIDA: A man arrested for robbery had one heckuva defense to the crime. He maintained that a lack of sex drove him to crime. The 25 year old suspect said he robbed a 7-Eleven only after his fiancée refused to make love with him.
LAME, LAME DEFENSE…
FLORIDA: A privately employed lifeguard in Hallandale Beach was fired for saving a swimmer’s life. Tomas Lopez was sacked because the rescue took place a few hundred yards past the border of Hallandale Beach that had been contracted out to an aquatic safety company. Six fellow lifeguards protested the firing of Lopez and the company promptly fired them also. The next day the company relented and offered Lopez his job back. He said no. He had moved on.
THE BOSS WAS A REAL SCROOGE…
OREGON: A Portland man allegedly hid his girlfriend in a large suitcase with wheels and smuggled her into his apartment building for a visit. The 50 year old girlfriend had been barred from his building for over a year after she smashed a fire extinguisher during a lover’s quarrel. The 96 pound woman was arrested this time for trespass.
THE HEADLINE READ: “THIS GUY HAD A LOT OF BAGGAGE”
OREGON: A trucker in Oregon who got too drunk to drive called his dispatcher and reported that he was being held at gunpoint. His dispatcher called the police who soon found the truck as well as the drunken liar nearby.
JUST ANOTHER DRUNKEN DUMMY!
