Weird Criminal Law Stories # 653: Dumb Florida!

FLORIDA: Rocky the Flying Squirrel Sans Bullwinkle? We learned that officials just smashed a trafficking ring that sent thousands of flying squirrels to South Korea. Seven people so far have been charged in the scheme that moved 3,600 of the squirrels over  three years. It is reported that poachers in central Florida allegedly netted over $213,000 from the deal. We learn further,  flying squirrels, which are protected in Florida, are popular pets in South Korea.

FLORIDA: Spaced Out, maybe? James Fleurant, 28, was arrested for repeatedly calling 911 to report “seeing aliens, little ones flying low.” The Vero Beach resident told the 911 operator he did not want “to go Independence Day on them,” an apparent reference to the 1996  sci-fi movie starring Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum, and Bill Pullman.

FLORIDA:  “How Chilling,” read the headline. A Marion County woman woke up to find a stranger eating out of her refrigerator. Sheriff’s deputies say Christopher Pennington stopped for a snack mid-burglary. When he was confronted by the woman, Pennington, 47, took off in her son’s truck which he then crashed, deputies said.

FLORIDA: Guess Who needs an Attorney? A Miami man has been accused of leading a double life as a ‘serial bank robber” – however not a very good one. According to authorities Aaron Honaker, 41, allegedly held up five banks beginning in September 2020, making off with  a total of only $1,850 prosecutors contend. He was arrested hauling around with a hammer and cash.

FLORIDA: Tuna Meltdown? Police arrested a Florida man after he became irate at a burger restaurant. Police allege he was yelling and screaming at Checkers’ employees, causing them to fear for their safety. Police learned that the suspect went off because he was upset the restaurant had no more lettuce for sandwiches.

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