Weird Criminal Law Stories 71

Waterbury, CN: A female employee at at a Connecticut police academy got just what she asked for.  License and Applications analyst Rochelle Wyler got annoyed when a fellow worker, ex-Waterbury Police Captain Francis Woodruff, called her a “clerk,”  She responded, “Bite me!”  He did, police said.  On her arm.  He was charged with disorderly conduct.


South Carolina:  Recently a  funeral director in this state  was stripped of his license after he came up with the creepiest solution to an unusual situation — a corpse too big to fit in the coffin.  Funeral director Michael Cave had one of his employees cut the legs off the 6-foot-7 man.  The decedent’s wife said she had picked  the standard coffin, and Cave — who was also fined $400 — had never suggested a bigger casket.

Yes, yes…We know… He was thinking outside the box..Yuk, Yuk , Yuk.

Chile, South America: The cocaine wasn’t in the suitcase.  It was the suitcase.  Chilean police say two suitcases carried by a woman about to fly to Spain were made of the drug — actually, a substance combining cocaine with resin and glass fiber.  They said a chemical process could have been used to sift out the drug.

They should have transported the coke in a submarine… I hear that’s all the rage these days…

Seattle, WA: It doesn’t pay to be the first zombie to arrive for a zombie convention.  A man dressed in all black, knee pads, a gas mask and carrying what appeared to be a machine gun was the first guest at an event promoting the Crypticon Horror Convention in Seattle, but someone mistook him for a gunman and called police.  A dozen police cars responded before someone realized the mistake.  No arrest was made.

Bet that was one embarrassed dummy…I mean zombie…

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