PENNSYLVANIA: An assault trial in Philly came to a halt after the victim’s prosthetic eye popped out as he testified about the attack that left him partially blind. While the man fished around for his $3,000 glass eye, the judge, with no irony, announced a recess due to the “unforeseen incident.” …AND WE THOUGHT JUSTICE WAS BLIND!
PENNSYLVANIA: When a 6-year old girl wanted to go visit her father in another town, she didn’t bother to wait until her sleeping mother woke up. She just grabbed her mother’s car keys, got into the family BMW and drove off. The girl drove about half a mile before hitting a pole, but she was not hurt. THE LITTLE GIRL HAD CHUTZPAH, BUT NO DRIVING EXPERIENCE… WASHINGTON, D.C.: The district’s Fire and Emergency Medical Service Department is being criticized after it showed up 30 minutes late to a scene where a 71-year old man died, and then sent a bill for $780 to his family. “I’m disturbed that we even received this bill,” said the man’s son Donald Ford, Jr. SAID BILL ONLY ADDED INSULT TO THE INJURY…. WASHINGTON: The headline read: “He’s in more than a wee bit of trouble.” According to police sources, a Seattle man was so drunk that he was hospitalized, put in a diaper and later a squad car – urinating all along the way. Nurses at Harborview Medical Center restrained the man in his hospital bed, but he still managed to urinate all over the floor. They put an adult diaper on him – then had to call police when he became belligerent. Police hauled him to jail – but he urinated in the back of the patrol car. …AND HE SHOUTED WEE, WEE, WEE ALL THE WAY HOME…
