Birdsong's Law Blog

CHINA: Lin Chen, a 67 year old woman who lives in Ningbo, who believed that police were not doing enough to stop speeding drivers on her street came up with a brilliant idea. She tied a blow up sex doll to a tree outside her house.  This prompted drivers to slow down to gawk and wonder why.  Police contend that since the doll went up, traffic accidents have gone down.

FLORIDA: A drunken man showed up at a County jail to visit his girlfriend then refused a deputy sheriff’s instruction to depart at the end of his visit with her. The man said he would not leave and told the deputy that he would have to arrest him to get rid of him.  That is just what the deputy did – arrest him.  Now he is closer to his girlfriend.

          BAD BREAK BUT HE’LL GET THREE HOTS AND A COT!

 GEORGIA: A 340 pound woman pepper sprayed and spit on employees at a Piggly Wiggly grocery store in Athens after they tried to stop her from stealing bacon, cheese, chicken and beer, police said. Lonneshia Appling,26, also punched a store clerk in the face as she left the store dropping cans of Coors Light.

          SOUNDS LIKE SHE WAS PREPARING A “MOVABLE FEAST.”

PENNSYLVANIA: A man in Peters Township left his bag of marijuana and

FLORIDA: A police officer already facing trial for stealing drugs got himself in more trouble when he ripped off his ankle monitor while out on bail and visited a strip club.  Brent Wooddell was located and taken into custody at the Cheetah strip club in Pompano Beach.

          BRENT, YOU CAN’T “CHEAT” THE ANKLE MONITOR PEOPLE.

  OHIO: A report out of Toledo maintains that an armed man dressed up like Darth Vader robbed a bank carrying a handgun. The robber escaped on a BMX bicycle, according to police.

THE ROBBER MAY HAVE TOLD THE TELLER I AM YOUR FATHER…

 FLORIDA: A man suspected of stealing merchandise from a Panama City store was

David Rosaler, a student in my Refugee and Asylum seminar, has written an excellent paper which he has given me permission to post on the blog.  In the paper he suggests that U.S. asylum law should be used to provide a safe-haven  for those fleeing persecution on the ground that they are witches. Read it and you will learn a great deal about witchcraft  and persecution down through the years. Enjoy.

A Case for Asylum for Individuals Persecuted on Account of Being Accused of Witchcraft

David Rosaler © 2013

I. Introduction

Harry Potter, David Copperfield, Harry Houdini, Merlin, David Blaine, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Moses, Cris Angel, and Jesus. What do the people on this list of real and fictional figures throughout time, have in common? All of them could be maimed, tortured, imprisoned or killed today in countries around the globe for practicing witchcraft. Sure, tales of wizardry, sorcery, magic, and the paranormal and occult make great fodder for television, movies, and literature in today’s western society, but many cultures around the world don’t take it so lightly. In many countries, the persecution of accused witches is commonplace in their societies and legal systems. In some, the violent persecution of accused witches is even big business as “witch-hunters” make huge profits from selling body parts of accused witches on the black market, which ironically are considered by many to be healing and ward off evil spirits. I propose that United States take aim at solving this problem, and help the victims of persecution on account of being accused of witchcraft, by granting them asylum in the U.S.

I chose this topic on a personal level. When I was a little boy, I was fascinated by magic and the supernatural. Then as I got older, I began learning magic tricks, reading magic books and magazines, attended magic shows and conventions, and even took magic lessons from a local magician. I practiced my tricks all the time. My dream was to become a magician. While I no longer practice magic, I still have that same love for it, so when I learned about the atrocities that take place around the world to accused witches and wizards, and thought about the fact that it could have been me being persecuted had I been born in another part of the world, I became very affected.

The first part of this paper will introduce the problem of witchcraft violence today.

BRAZIL: A man held up a sex shop in Brasilia, walking out with a $4,000 gold plated vibrator.  The clerk, noting, the bandit forgot the charger, said, “I really don’t know what he”ll do with it.  I’ll leave it to his imagination.”

                   SOUNDS LIKE NO BBBBZZZZZZZZZZ…..

 TENNESSEE: It has been reported that a golfer in the state recently hit a hole in one – however the “hole” being the mouth of a wife of a passing motorcyclist. The poor golfer badly hooked a 14th hole tee shot onto a highway where it bounced and hit a woman motorcyclist riding with her husband.  Several teeth were knocked out and she received hospital treatment.

          NO CITATION WAS ISSUED BUT WE SMELL LAW SUIT…

IDAHO: A courthouse was evacuated when a suspicious package showed up and