Weird Criminal Law Stories 34

Here are more weird criminal law stories Birdsong has found for your reading enjoyment.  A few of them are from Florida, as well as from around the world.

Florida:  A paraplegic held up a Florida bank in his motorized wheelchair, and then stuffed the cash into his prosthetic leg.  But he had not gotten far when police caught up with him ten minutes later.

In the end he did not have a leg to stand on, ha, ha, ha.

Florida:  Was it a “club sandwich?”  A 19 year old Florida man was charged with battery for hitting his girlfriend in the face with a sandwich while she drove him home.  The blow was so hard, it knocked the victim’s glasses off and almost caused her to lose control of the car.

Must been one helluva sandwich!

Fort pierce, FL: An 11-year old Fort Pierce boy hit his mother in the head with a saw before offering her $5 not to call the police.  It wasn’t enough, because the woman – who suffered a minor laceration – called police and had the boy arrested for aggravated battery.

Sounds like this kid was in serious need of a “time out.”

Pennsylvania: A bank robber in this state was so furious when told that the tellers’ tills were empty he threatened to file a complaint with management before fleeing. When the robber walked in, the tellers were on a shift change and waiting for their cash drawers to be filled.  The indignant but hapless robber was caught 10 blocks away.

How dare they not have money for me to steal!  I’m going to management about this outrage!

Germany:  An inmate escaped from a German prison by posting himself in a giant FedEx box filled with dirty laundry.  When the delivery truck made its next stop, convicted drug dealer Hans Laing got out, picked the lock and ran off.  ‘It’s the kind of thing people think only happens in films,” said an embarrassed police spokesperson.

Next time it will be UPS.

England: A dozen men were discovered in the back of a truck in England after they began singing songs celebrating their arrival in the United Kingdom.  Apparently, the driver did not know that he had stowaways, and he called police when he heard the very off-key singing.

Note to illegal immigrants: Don’t start celebrating until you actually reach your destination…dummies!



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