Gardenerville, NV: We learn that Ms, Misty McCollister, 35, will soon be sentenced after pleading guilty to attempted child abuse and neglect in Gardnerville. She had been arrested near her home after a witness reported seeing her car weaving in and out of its lane and varying its speed. The problem? Her 12 year old son was behind the wheel because Misty was too drunk to drive.
…so dangerous…it wasn’t even nightfall yet! Mommy needed a time out.
Trenton, NJ: Those low-slung pants men wear these days can sometimes be a real problem. A fellow out for a good time at a dance club in Trenton exchanged angry words with several foes in the club who pulled out knives. The outnumbered fellow turned to run but only made it a few feet before his pants fell down around his ankles. We learn that he was treated for multiple stab wounds but is expected to make a full recovery.
REEK, REEK, REEK, REEK…. STAB, STAB, STAB….
Nebraska: A teenager was arrested for DWI on Halloween. He was dressed as a Breathalyzer. Matthew Nieveen’s costume consisted of a boxy plastic sack that read “6.9 Blood Alcohol Level.” It included a nozzle strategically placed in a sensitive area of of body that read, “Blow here.”
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We get it: “6.9” and “Blow here.” How sophomoric! He needed to be arrested.
Fayetteville, NC: Seems there is a new class of polite burglars in North Carolina. They leave thank you notes at the homes they burglarize. Police say that two 19 year old burglars left such notes at homes they burglarized from which they stole $5,000 worth of electronics and food. At one home they left a note on a napkin that said “Thanks.” At another home they wrote on a wall of the house — “We love the stuff we got.”
This all makes Miss Manners so proud!
