NEW YORK CITY: This horribly strange accident will probably lead to a successful wrongful death lawsuit. A slow-moving street sweeper truck struck and killed a man in Brooklyn near the Barclay Center after a Brooklyn Nets basketball game. It appears that the 40 something year old victim was crossing Flatbush Avenue near Atlantic Avenue about 1 am and moved right into the path of the sanitation vehicle – but he was, at first, able to get back to the curb upon hearing the driver honking his horn and the driver yelling at him. It appears, further, that the sanitation driver believed the man was in the clear and continued on his path. As the machine was passing by the confused man he suddenly fell into the street and was sucked up into the vehicle near rear tire. The distraught driver remained at the scene until police arrived. He was not charged with any crime.
DEATH BY A STREET SWEEPING MACHINE, HOW OFFAL…
NEW YORK CITY: Two Bronx neighbors were returning from the Dominican Republic when authorities caught the women by the seat of their pants – quite literally. Priscilla Pena and Michelle Blassingale had just arrived at JFK aboard JetBlue airliner from Santo Domingo, when they were stopped by Customs and Border Protection officers. A drug sniffing dog had alerted officers when it neared Pena, the officers searched her luggage but found no drugs. When the officers initiated pat-down searches of the two women they discovered that each was wearing a “diaper” filled with cocaine rigged around their hindquarters. The women were charged with smuggling over six pounds of cocaine.
YES, YES, WE KNOW… IT WAS REAL JUNK IN THEIR TRUNKS!!
NEW YORK CITY: A Bronx man accused of killing and dismembering his mother before taking a photo of himself with her severed head made his first appearance in court wearing a garbage bag. At his first appearance Bahsid McLean, 23, professed his innocence. “I didn’t do anything wrong!” McLean blurted out after his lawyer asked for medication for him. As for the garbage bag, defense attorney Jerry Iannece said, “it was necessary because McLean kept urinating on himself.
EEEEEWWW…A CRAZY PISSER…
NEW YORK CITY: Matthew Matagrano is probably the only New Yorker who wanted to break into jail. Matagrano, a tubby imposter, repeatedly faked his way into the most secure city jails by impersonating a Corrections Department investigator, using a fake badge to infiltrate at least five facilities over a one week period. Matagrano, 36, is also a high risk sex offender with a lengthy rap sheet who stole $5,000 worth of equipment from security officers at the various jails during the same week. Matagrano who stands 5-feet-8 and weighs 340 pounds is now awaiting trial in one of the very jails he “broke into” during his wild week.
SEEMS BREAKING INTO JAILS CAN BE LUCRATIVE – BUT NOT VERY SMART…
