OKLAHOMA: When an Oklahoma City mother found a pants-less woman intruder in her kitchen at 6:30 a.m., there was a very good explanation. “My name is Michelle and I’m just having cookies and milk,” she said. Police arrested Michelle Stephens, 27, who had allegedly taken off her pants and entered the house through a kitchen window from the patio.
Michelle sounds disturbed, to say the least…
CALIFORNIA: A Los Angeles County jail inmate has filed a lawsuit that maintains that he was shot with a “ray gun.” Andrew Fuchs contends that deputies blasted him with a military-style heat ray. In his legal papers he claims, “The device fires an invisible electro-magnetic radiation heat beam, causing unbearable pain to inmates.” Be aware that Fuchs has been diagnosed with schizophrenia, however, the county had, in fact, announced plans to use such devices in the future.
Sounds like Fuchs is already living in the future in his head…
NEW JERSEY: A thief with a taste for toys felt so guilty about stealing a young boy’s red wagon, she showed up at his house with a new wagon and a stuffed animal. She had been caught on tape, along with a friend, stealing 6-year-old Alex Bean’s wagon in the town of Belmar. The video went viral, prompting the woman to make amends. Alex’s mother maintains that she has forgiven the thief and will not press charges.
The thief did this because she did not want to ride to the station in a police wagon!
WASHINGTON: A half-naked man in Seattle went on a boat ramming rampage at a marina. The man allegedly jumped into a 35 foot boat at the Queen City Yacht Club and just started plowing into other boat berthed there. He only stopped after someone fired a broadside at the pirated boat with a shotgun and wounded him.
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum…