FLORIDA: This was a funny report. It read, in part: “police arrested a man for bringing a pussy into a strip joint.” Managers at the Emerald City gentlemen’s club in the town of Murdock refused to allow Everett Lages, 47, and his pet kitten into the club. The intoxicated Lages became angry and telephoned 911. He was taken into custody for misuse of 911, trespassing and disorderly conduct. The kitten was put in the safe hands of animal control.
NO PUSSIES ALLOWED IN A STRIP JOINT – WHO KNEW?
CALIFORNIA: Moments after San Francisco Judge Lillian Sing let car burglar Phillip Bernard off with just a warning, the bad boy smashed open the rear window of a vehicle parked outside the courthouse, officials report. It just so happens that the car was owned by Judge Sing. Bernard, 32, was arrested and is now behind bars.
PROVES NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED… IRONIC, NO?
CALIFORNIA: Cornell Jackson and Marquet Dorsey, both more than 200 pounds and six feet tall went through the trouble of wearing dresses and makeup to scam stores in a scheme involving prepaid credit cards, police report. When one of the “perps” card would be declined, the other man would quickly call the store pretending to represent the credit card company and authorize the purchase. Police report the scheme did not work out well and both were arrested.
TWO SILLY CRETINS IN DRAG…
TEXAS: Carrie King, 34, called Galveston police to report an intruder in her home. When police arrived they walked in on King furiously blasting away at Elvis Alexander, 53, with her paintball gun. Alexander was covered in yellow paint but was otherwise uninjured as police took him into custody.
KA-POW, KA-POW, KA-POW….
