NEW YORK CITY: YOOOUCH! We learn that a self-described “sex god” who hoped to give his wife the night of her life nearly caused his genitals to erupt when he shot liquefied Viagra directly into his penis. The couple was heading into Round 3 when swelling and pain put a damper on the fun and forced them to head for the emergency room the man was in so much pain, he couldn’t even walk.
NEW YORK CITY: Bow Wow!! So sad. A Bronx man was sentenced to a year in jail for beating his 4-month-old puppy so badly, she had to be euthanized. Dwayne Gentles brutalized the little pit bull, named Brandy, for much of her short life according to a court report about the case. Testimony at trial revealed that Brandy had suffered 13 broken ribs, a jaw fracture that prevented her from eating, and two broken legs. Gentles’ sentence was for a misdemeanor, injuring an animal, after a jury acquitted him of felony aggravated animal cruelty. Testimony at trial also revealed that the puppy was emaciated when Gentles finally took her to a veterinarian in 2012.
NEW YORK CITY: Can we say the suspect was bottled up? A dumb crook on the Lower East Side of Manhattan ducked under a liquor store’s electronic security gate as it was closing – sealing him in the store until police arrived. Jermal James, 28, was discovered in the liquor store one Monday night in August, according to the criminal complaint. It appears that James had ducked under the gate as the owner was locking up for the night. With the lights off and nowhere to go, James pulled $2,100 from the register and $18 worth of alcohol from the shelf. However, fleeing with the loot was not an option because when the gate closed behind him the store was automatically locked moments after he had entered. When police did arrive a few hours later James was arrested for burglary.
NEW YORK: The poor defendant was punished even before the trial ended! An upstate New York Judge declared a mistrial a day after two jurors on their lunch hour witnessed the gun-rap defendant in their case get beaten with a chair outside a doughnut shop. Jerome Johnson was attacked around 1 pm at a Dunkin’ Donuts across the street from the Rensselaer County courthouse in Troy, according to a news report. Johnson suffered a concussion and was transported to a local hospital, his lawyer claims. The two jurors expressed that they could no longer continue with the case and a mistrial was declared because only twelve jurors and one alternate had been seated.
