Weird Criminal Law Stories # 340: Tinkle, Tinkle…

WASHINGTON: A 21-year-old Seattle man urinating in a stranger’s backyard bit off more than he could chew when a confrontation with the homeowner became bloody and heated. The homeowner told the urinator to get off his property, but he ignored the demand and the two began to fight. The urinator then bit off a chunk of the homeowner’s ear. The urinator sounds like a Mike Tyson wannabe.


NORTH CAROLINA: Checher la femme! We learn that a mortician outdid police and a medical examiner in solving a homicide. Investigators in Spring Lake declared that David Worley, 39, had died in a tragic car accident after his body was found near his crashed vehicle. However, the mortician found stab wounds that the ME had missed. The victim’s wife was arrested shortly thereafter.


WASHINGTON: Could he have been on drugs or was he just drunk? First he was arrested for trespassing at a Walmart in Sedro-Wooley. A few hours later he stole a car and used it to ram his way into an art museum. The 22-year-old burglar was seen, nude and bleeding, on video cameras rearranging ladders, pieces of an antique stove and other objects in a museum storage area. All of this sounds like nothing more than a call for help– help for his mental health!


LOUISIANA:  If one wants to steal crawfish tails, they would have to be in better shape than 48-year-old Erich Williams.  Police in Thibodaux allege that Williams grabbed a bag of crawfish tails from a grocery store and ran off. However, it is reported that by the time he reached his car, he was so winded he had little strength left to blow into the anti-DWI ignition interlock device to start his car. Yes, he was soon arrested. My God, Williams is a thief and a drunk, too!




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