Weird Criminal Law Stories # 476: Butt-lift surgery?

FLORIDA: Butt-lift surgery? The city of Gainesville, says that it has gotten to the bottom of an employee’s alleged embezzlement. Investigators claim Natwaina Clark, 33, stole $93,000 from the city and used $8,500 of it for butt-lift cosmetic surgery. Clark was fired and has pleaded not guilty to larceny and a scheme to defraud.


ARKANSAS: It is a quite simple request! Managers of the Craighead County Courthouse have posted a simple request for visitors: “Please stop urinating in the elevator.” It appears that a steady “stream” of culprits have been relieving themselves in the Jonesboro building’s elevator for years, even though there is a restroom just 25 feet away, maintenance workers said.


ALABAMA: Unsuccessful escape? It appears that a would-be truck thief made a really slow escape in June because he didn’t know how to handle a manual transmission. Randy Vert, 29, led police on a 16-mile chase at speeds that never topped 30 mph, according to police. “Thank God he couldn’t find second gear; the pursuit could have gotten all the way up to 35 mph,” Chief Jefferson County Sheriff’s Deputy Randy Christian deadpanned when the chase was over and an arrest was made.


CHINA: The headline read: “Someone failed potty training.” Firefighters in Guangzhou had to work for six hours to rescue a woman whose foot got stuck in a toilet. Luckily, she was not injured.


ILLINOIS: Impromptu Strip Shows for Inmates? Federal officials who operate a women’s jail in Chicago say they can’t stop impromptu strip shows for the inmates. We learn that for many years, people have been going to the top of a parking garage and putting on shows for the women residents of the Metropolitan Correction Center – who flick the light to show their appreciation. A representative for the Bureau of Prisons said, “Because it is private property, the Bureau of Prisons has no authority to remove people.” An executive for the company that operates the garage says he doesn’t know anything about the free shows.


KANSAS: A change of mind? A 71-year-old Kansas City man who said he was robbing a bank to go to jail in an effort to escape his wife has changed his mind about the going to jail part. At Sentencing in mid-June Lawrence Ripple asked for mercy. He blamed post-heart-surgery depression for the spouse-dissing robbery that made headlines last September. He was eventually sentenced to six months of home confinement.


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