CALIFORNIA: The headline read, “Dog sitter more shag than wag.” We learn that a woman hired a pet sitter through the dog-walking app Wag and spotted the person naked in her home when she checked the puppy cam. Turns out that Rosie Brown booked 26-year-old pet sitter Casey Brengle to take care of her two pups, but instead the woman invited her boyfriend to the home for a romp in Ms. Brown’s bed. In her defense Ms. Brengle claimed “It got hot and she doesn’t like wearing clothes.
UNITED KINGDOM: “No Use crying over spilled wine,” read the headline. We learn that a waiter at an upscale British steakhouse found out that when he served a rare French wine that cost $5,700 to a diner who had ordered a wine that cost only $330. The restaurant had to eat the cost and the owner did not fire the waiter. He is giving her a second chance.
TENNESSEE: “Kiddie Hitlers’ nixed,” read the headline. An elementary school in Rutherford County will no longer have a student portray Adolf Hitler in its living-history exhibit after a group of children began giving Nazi salutes. A school district spokesman said that the boy portraying Hitler was supposed to give a speech and a Nazi salute, but other students then started giving the salute in an out of rehearsals. The spokesman also said that the school district does not condone “hate-filled or insensitive” action symbols.
NEW YORK CITY: Idiot ammo arrest. A suspected gang member was caught and arrested for trying to smuggle a fully loaded assault-rifle clip into a Bronx courthouse. In mid-May 2019, Isaiah Brown was on his way to the courthouse for a Housing Court case when he was caught at the metal detector. Court officers confiscated the fully loaded rifle magazine with 24 rounds, including a hollow-point bullet. Brown was charged with third degree criminal possession of a weapon and related crimes.
WASHINGTON: “Look up in the sky, is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s a penis, read the headline.” The Navy Times has revealed – two years after the fact – that the skywriting phallus that suddenly appeared above the state was created by two bored Navy pilots. “Draw a giant penis, that would be awesome,” one of them said. “I could definitely draw one,” the other replied, saying he would use the plane’s exhaust. The cockpit hijinks got both pilots disciplined.
Pittsburgh: Take two of these and call your attorney in the morning. A San Francisco man took a double dose of his medical marijuana cookies and freaked out aboard a US Airways jet in route from Philadelphia to LA, screaming, dropping his pants and fighting with the crew, and forcing the pilot to make an emergency landing in Pittsburgh. Kinman Chan, 30, was taken into FBI custody.
