Weird Criminal Law Stories #570: Invaded by a bare?

FLORIDA: The headline read, “Her home was invaded by a bare.” We learn that a naked man ransacked a 93-year-old woman’s house, leaving behind a candy wrapper and chocolate smudges. The Edgewater woman awoke to find Shawn Plotts in her home, police said. He allegedly scattered her belongings before fleeing. Police discovered Plotts wandering outside in jeans, with the woman’s drivers’ license, credit car and car keys.

MISSOURI: A flaming fool! It has been reported that a forgetful minivan driver left a St. Louis gas station with the nozzle still attached – spraying gasoline onto a bright blue Lamborghini Huracan. The $400,000 sports car burst into flames and was destroyed. Luckily no was hurt.

NEBRASKA:  Back to back speeding tickets? An Iowa woman drew back-to-back speeding tickets in Nebraska. After getting a citation for doing 92 mph in a 75-mph zone in a 2018 Ford Mustang, she put it behind her quickly, police said. She allegedly sped away from the scene, reaching 142 mph, before she was ticketed again by the same police officer. The 31-year-old woman was arrested on suspicion of willful reckless driving. YOU THINK?

WASHINGTON: The headline read, “A jail cell may not feel too cramped now.” A Spokane man wanted for violating an order of protection stuffed himself into a washing machine before he was eventually sniffed out by a police dog. “The adult version of hide-and-seek never turns out well for anyone,” the Spokane Police Department said in a Facebook post.

WISCONSIN: Yep, he was a “Bozo.” A county commissioner wore a clown suit to court to argue that his $10 ticket for driving without a seatbelt was a joke. Mark McCune, who serves Washington county, donned clown shoes, makeup and a wig, irking Judge Steven Cain, who said the bozo move was an “insult to the court.” McCune had to pay the fine.

WISCONSIN: “Shoe cam” blow up problem. In June of 2018 a man fashioned a so called “shoe cam” to take videos up women’s skirts, he admitted to police. However, his idea blew up in his face – or, actually on his foot. We learn that as the 32-year-old perv was strapping on the cam at home, the battery exploded, causing minor burns, said police in Madison. Wracked with guilt, the fellow tried to surrender to police, who had to send him on his way because his attempt at criminal perversity was a failure and no one had been victimized.

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