Weird Criminal Law Stories # 575: The meat belongs on the plate…

FLORIDA: The headline read, “The meat belongs on the plate, Romeo.” We learn that a drunken man was jailed after he performed an unwanted strip-tease for a woman at a Clearwater Steakhouse, police, report. James Jordan, 24, allegedly went into Chip-in-Dale style strip gyrations while the woman dined with her husband at a Kobe Steakhouse. When she asked him to stop, he allegedly threatened to beat up her husband.

GEORGIA: Noodle-nappers? It was grand theft ramen. Police report that bandits looted $100,000 worth of noodles from a tractor trailer parked at  a Fayetteville, gas station in July 2018. The 53-foot truck was locked, police report. The police are still on the hunt for the noodle-nappers.

MAINE: Daredevil or idiot? It has been reported that a motorist was arrested for travelling from Massachusetts to Maine on a small motorized scooter without a license – and using only his cell phone as a makeshift headlight. By the time police arrested the 26-year-old driver at 1:30 am on  a 2018 July Friday in Kittery, Maine, he had cruised 120 miles from New Bedford.

INDIANA: OINK! We recently learned that an adorable pet pig foiled a burglary by striking fear into the hearts of the intruders, according to police. The bandits had just smashed their way through the back door of a home when they were surprised by the guard hog, Dumplin. The thieves “were probably like, we don’t want to deal with this,” the homeowner said. The bandits fled empty handed.

INDIANA: What a lettuce stash… A truckload of lettuce was no cover for this weed. Police arrested two men when a routine commercial-vehicle inspection of their tractor trailer revealed 260 pounds of marijuana hidden in their load of fresh lettuce. Authorities report that the truck was heading from Colorado to Florida.

IRELAND: Real horse power…  A man was arrested by police in July 2018 with a horse stuffed into the back of his van, according to authorities. Police saw the van and pulled it over for a violation, then discovered the back-seat mare. The driver was taken into custody without incident. No news on what happened to the horse.

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