ALABAMA: Contraception Ploy? A female lawmaker has proposed a bill in the legislature that would require men to get a vasectomy after age 50. Rep. Rolando Hollis’ legislation would apply to men when they reach 50, or to those men who have fathered three children. It’s her response to a new state abortion bill. A Bit Obtuse but it Might Work!
HONG KONG: Headline, “Foul TP bandits flushed out in Hong Kong.” We learn that on a Monday in February of 2020, armed robbers in Hong Kong held up a delivery driver – wiping him clean of hundreds of rolls of toilet paper in a city facing acute shortages amid the coronavirus outbreak. The deliveryman was threatened by three knife-wielding men who took toilet paper worth more than $130 U.S., according to police. Two suspects were later arrested for taking 600 rolls and police are still searching for the third suspect. Toilet paper had become a hot commodity as the virus spread, with stores struggling to keep them in stock during as residents cleaned the shelves in panic-buying sprees.
FLORIDA: The headline read, “What gave them away?” In the early months of 2020 two men were arrested for hauling crystal meth, ecstasy and cocaine in a gag gift-style pouch with the words “Big Bag Full Of Drugs” printed on it. Police said they found the dope after Ian Simmons, 34, of Orlando was pulled over in Santa Rosa County for speeding. He and passenger Michael Reinhardt were both charged with drug possession and drug -trafficking. STONE IDIOTS
INDIANA: “TRUE TAT!” It has been reported that a drug and car thief suspect who had the words,” Crime Pays,” tattooed on his forehead was arrested for a second time since December 2019, following a police chase in Terre Haute. Donald Murray, 38, was quickly caught on a Monday in February, unlike in December when he eluded police for several days – until his mug shot, with the inked phrase, went viral.
FLORIDA: Criminal Grandma? We learn that a grandmother allegedly allowed her sons to run a drug ring out of her old-folks home was taken to jail, authorities say. The men allegedly hid marijuana and guns under 64-year-old grandmother Serena Weston’s bed at the Viridian senior-living complex in Saint Petersburg. It appears that federal wiretap led to the arrest. We wonder how much money granny made for her part in the conspiracy?
FLORIDA: Socked by the sock. A shooting suspect recently fled so fast, his shorts and a sock fell off, leaving behind DNA evidence, police said. According to police, genetic material collected from the lone sock matched that of a 19-year-old St. Petersburg man who ran from the scene of the nonfatal shooting. I pity the fool…
