Weird Criminal Law Stories # 689: Kitty Napping?

AUSTRAILIA: Kitty napping, perhaps? An ex-soldier in full tactical gear allegedly burst into an animal shelter with an assault rifle and tied up a worker in a failed bid to get his kitten back. Tony Wittmann, 44, was so mad when workers at the Lost Dogs’ Home in Melbourne said he needed to wait a day  to get his pet he allegedly menaced a 23-year-old employee with the gun. He left empty handed but was arrested and charged with kidnapping, false imprisonment and attempted armed robbery.

AUSTRAILIA: He could have really needed a drink! We learn that a clumsy bandit got stuck in a crevice under the roof of a pub while breaking in – forcing police to rescue and arrest him. The idiot burglar, a 30-year-old from Ipswich tried to punch through the ceiling of Landsborough Pub in Queensland after getting trapped during a heist gone bad. He was stuck for four hours before a worker heard him calling for help.

ARGENTINA: Here come the police strippers, NOT! It has been reported that revelers at a sex party thought men in police uniforms were strippers hired for a kinky performance. Unfortunately, the men were real police raiding the place. Twenty couples were arrested for breaking coronavirus restrictions at the secret swinger’s party on a farm in Mar del Plata, after a caller tipped of police.

ARIZONA: Dumping Dead? We learn that a man who once operated a company that managed cadavers for research was arrested for allegedly  dumping donated human remains. Walter Mitchell, 59, was charged in late December 2020, with improperly removing remains after two dozen limbs and five skulls were found in a forest outside of Prescott. So Grisly!

FLORIDA: A grave mistake? Two men accused of robbing the final resting  places of veterans told authorities they did so because  “the spirit of veterans  is so much stronger in a hero.” Brian Tolentino, 43, and Juan Lopez, 39, allegedly broke into four graves in Polk County, removing body parts they used to build a shrine.

FLORIDA: Something to do… In early-January 2021 a man set his own truck on fire to give police something to do. Kevin Murphy, 28, admitted dousing his Chevy with gasoline and lighting it up, according the Okaloosa County Sheriff ‘s Office.  The arsonist said he “wanted something for the  sheriff’s office to do.” Deputies arrested Mr. Murphy on arson and drug charges.

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